Name Brand (at the drugstore)

Can I put this back on the shelf?
This isn't what I paid for
It's to expensive
Is this the cure for heart sores?

This is an unreasonable price,
Can I get it for cheaper?
I need something that will stimulate my mind
a little deeper.

Can I stuff it with cotton balls?
So I can keep it fresh and Managed.
Can I seal the top?
So it won't get damanged.

This drug here seems a little hectic,
maybe we should keep it basic.
Umm...
Lets try Generic.

FRAGILE (Handle With Care)

Been Knocked down
So many times
Heard the lies,
Line after line.

How much more can I take?
God I need you,
He said "Keep your head up,
I never left you".

What do I do?
I feel ashamed.
My world has been shattered,
am I the one to blame?

The Devil is winning,
I lost the fight.
I lost my will, my mind,
and my might.

I thought he loved me
He conquered a fool,
My heart is broken
This is something you can't undo.

Who do I seek?
I lost my guide,
He took my heart,
and the pep in my stride.

I'm angered.
How could I let this happen?
God I'm holding on to your hand
Better yet I'm grabbing!

Heal me MY LORD!
Put the pieces back together.
You can make it alright,
You make me feel much better.

For the next person
Who chooses this dare,
CAUTION! I warn you,
you better handle with care.

Night of Sincerity..

Soft Kisses on my cheek,
Tender touches on my thighs,
Sweet nibbles on my lips,
While staring in my eyes.

Voice Smooth like melodies,
Love so passionate from below,
Gives me moans of temptation,
As my speakerbox flows.

Watching your flower Blossom,
As my peach Sweeten,
Ready to feel the fruits of your labor,
Enough with all this teasing.

Our bodies connecting with elegance,
With slow, deep remarks,
You take in my shiny jewel
As I embrace your bark.

I feel the nature of your rise,
The heartbeat of your wood,
The Contractions of my pelvis,
Holding on to your manhood.

We collapsed against one another,
Bodies relaxed from sensations,
The lava flows from the explosion,
We can still feel the vibrations.

This the meeting of two precious souls,
Lasting for the long run,
This the day that we,
Intertwined as ONE.

Cloudy Eyes Clear Skies (Love that Has Been Lost)

If it Isn't so..
Well maybe it is..
Disguise?
Real Self?
Confusing Interrupts my sane mind.
Kind?
Generous?
Maybe self indulging
I likes it before,
So why not now?
Pretending?
Make believe?
Questions from a corrupted heart
My eyes can't make out what my heart feels
My spirit won't float because my soul is not real.
I breathe slow breaths
Intake the wind
Dirty?
Non Observant?
Sweaty Palms
Goosebumps
Late night Sweats and sleeping pills.
Misguided,
My body collided
with trouble...
Awaken with soft hands
but still see nothing
The sky is very clear
But my eyes are Blurry
And yet...
I'm Still
UNSURE

Just Bothered!

Lately I have been thinking more and more about the family, I do not know. This is includes, my father side of the family. I don't know my dad like I'm suppose to and my siblings and I only talk to one another when something bad happens. Is that right? Me and my dad never really had an relationship I can't say anything that stands out about him, or that I remember about him. I just knew who he is, where he lives, his age, and how many kids he got. Oh and how he treated my mother. But as far as what he likes, who he is as a person, I have no clue. I have two older brothers and a sister. Yes I'm the baby. Lol. My oldest brother we have never been close and my other brother we use to love one another, he use to come visit me whenever he had the chance he was my favorite and still is a little bit. My sister and I never had that sister relationship, when we see each other we speak, but that's about it. I don't know her and she doesn't know me. This has been taking a toll on me and weighing on me very heavy. I know of my nieces and nephews but I'm not a true auntie, at least that's how I feel. I wish it could be differently, but I guess we all waiting on one another. But that's all, just wanted to say this!

Family is the root of your heart!

Angel B.

Overwhelmed!!!!

Do you ever feel like the world is on your shoulders? Like your the only one in the situation your in, and you just don't know how to handle society? Bothered, because you can't fix it with your hands? Well this how I feel at this moment. Why?

First off, Jerry is leaving to go back full time into the army, and it will be the first time I experience something like that. I mean, how do I tell the baby that daddy wont be coming home to see you, or we can't go visit daddy this weekend. I feel more for her than for myself. She is the one, who is kind of missing out on things with her father, as well as him. I couldn't imgaine the things that he may feel. I am anxious for what the future may hold, but I also want him home twenty-four seven by my side. I'm staying back for at least a year to save and build money. there are some pros to this, but I just know that I will miss him. I think about my step daughter and how I nor his sister will be able to see her, during the time that he is gone. Why? Her mother is a total control freak, she's a nut job, and she's not really a fit parent. She doesn't know how to get along with his other family, and she doesn't want to. Enough about her....I want him to be here to see Autumn grow in her Gymnastics class, to watch me lose this weight (wink). So much I want him here for but I know that he is doing this better us. So I won't complain I guess. Lol.

Secondly, I'm working out and this is so hard. I tell myself constantly, how could I LET myself get this big. I mean it hurts, BAD when I work out. I enjoy it and I know the results would be rewarding. I just wish that this would come off much sooner. I want to be able bend down to give Autumn a hug, or run and play tag with her, just do what a lot of parents do with their kids, instead of being tired all the time. Trust its not easy being me.

Also, balancing my work, with my workout, Autumn, and now Im trying to go back to school. I am so overwhelmed with stuff, but I have to have determination otherwise things WON'T get done. Its not impossible its just hard.

Don't waste valuable time.
Angel B.

No One Available!

Ok so this is totally coming from left field. I want to plan trips this year, but it seems as if all my friends can't seem to get away from reality for a split second. I want to have a nice group of us together and just have a blast. God knows we all need this.

The places I want to go are, Las Vegas, I know will extremely fun. Jamaica, we have a blast. Puerto Rico, just to relax off the coast. Maybe the dells, a getaway..

Who knows these are my ideas and I wanted to share with my readers what I be thinking on a regular basis. If any of my friends read this, Holla at ya girl.

Angel B.

Oh Miami is another spot.. Lol

The Pain!

It has happened. Today was the day that the Lord has called my Papa home. He will be missed and loved even in his other life. I will make sure that my daughter continue to keep those memories of him, because he was truly one of God's servants. He was soooo generous, and giving. I wondered why did he give soo much. I finally found out that it was because God told him to do so. I want to be exactly like him, and grow and give just like him. He will be truley missed. I love you G -Daddy..

Your Angel Rennie...

Letting Go and Letting God...

So last night Jerry and I decided to let go and let God. We are going to go our seperate ways, and its a very tough decision. I have always told myself that I would never just stay for the sake of the children and I kinda felt like it was going to that point. I love that man with all my heart and thats why I have to let go. I felt like I couldn't trust him with anything. I mean he would tell me something and Immediately I would think that it was a lie. How can I live and Love unconditionally with those kind of thoughts. So we are looking for him a new place and I am moving in with my Mom. All of this by March. I told him that I am still here for him and that maybe since we won't be living together that we can go back to those days that we first met and I was pregnant and have fun again. This way we can see if being with each other is what we want. He will be able to do what he wants and I won't have to worry about what he is doing. As well as me. I told him I will help with his bills if he needs the help, just to call me up and let me know. So we will see how this works out. Just have to rebuild what we have lost. And yes Autumn will be fine. Lol.